Why Did Elizabeth Edwards Let Her Husband Run?

Boy, my mom and I vehemently disagree about the Edwards imbroglio. On Sunday, she launched into what I could tell was just a sad, sad story for her, about how she'd been in a cafe in Rhinebeck, having breakfast, surrounded by weekenders ordering their $15 plates of eggs and sausage, opening the Sunday New York Times and, in all the umbrage that can be mustered before noon, bellowing about what a cad Edwards was; what a schlemiel; another Slick Willy, "and even cursing and saying the basest things about this man, when it should be a private matter," said my mom. "And a very sad one, between him and his wife, and none of our business."

And I had to tell her, I agreed with all the things the people around her were saying; that I did not care who he had sex with, but he could not lie; that that I could not abide.

"What's happened to you there in Oregon?" she said, the tone amused but also bewildered that I had wandered so far from my uber-liberal NYC roots.

I just came upon an article that, I think, bridges our two positions. And though she does not read my blog, here's "Haunted by Elizabeth," for you, mom. And a little clip:

Somewhere in all this, [Elizabeth], too, put the blinders on. One can only assume she was thinking that he wouldn’t be found out. What if he had somehow gotten into more serious contention? What if he had actually won the nomination? What if had come out now, on the practical eve, of the convention? Would the media and the public just swallow hard and say, oh well, old news. None of our business.

Not this year. It would have been a mess, a bigger one than there is now.

Comments

[Kevin]

How does your "ultra-liberal" mom feel about a politician who not only voted for the Patriot Act, but co-sponsored it; who voted for the Iraq War; and who was the most consistent Congressional yap-lap dog trotting along behind Joe Lieberman? Because that was the John Edwards on record; the populist hero was both a chimera and a very recent reinvention.

More to the point, how would she feel about a stranger who carelessly and purposely devastated a woman with cancer at her most vulnerable emotional and physical time? And how would she feel about a man who was that woman's husband doing that?

"None of our business." Would she say the same thing about a man who punched his wife in the twat? And isn't what he did the emotional equivalent, except far, far worse?

[Zev]

I did not care who he had sex with, but he could not lie

Ah, but having sex with one woman while married to another is, on its face, an act of deception.

[Zev]

a politician who not only voted for the Patriot Act, but co-sponsored it; who voted for the Iraq War; and who was the most consistent Congressional yap-lap dog trotting along behind Joe Lieberman

Those are the good things about Edwards.

[Zev]

I keep forgetting that html code doesn't take on this site.

[Alice Bachini-Smith]

When my first marriage fell apart, my ex-husband and I were entirely honest with each other, and that was good enough for both of us then. But years later I finally realised that the often quite distant friends and relatives who were thrown by our marriage breakdown were not being as unreasonable as I thought at the time. I had allowed them to believe in something that didn't really exist.

So now I think there's a decent argument that staying married while privately having other relationships/ sexual contact is a deception of those who believe in your assumed monogamous marriage. People are vulnerable and scared, and we like to believe in things that seem good, and marriage is a biggie.

Having said that, I've no idea where private/ public should overlap for public figures- huge, horrible subject.

[Kate]

But there's no justification for spending donations on your mistress. I can't wait to see how many campaign finance laws were broken.

[Zev]

Well, if the mistress isn't kept happy she could sink the campaign, so that's some justification, no?